Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Suppress and Depress the view of a Tamilian!!!

I am sure all of you would have guessed by now! Yes, this blog is a tttrrrrrribute to T.Rajendar, sorry, Vijayyyyyyyyyya T.Rajendar (Numerology am...enna koduma saravanan ithu!).

The most enjoyable entertainment for any Tamil get-together in US is to talk about T.R and watch his videos in YouTube.

So, here is a list of his wonderful videos we had so much fun watching!!! This is my holiday treat for you! Start a great New Year having total fun watching these!

It is so much fun to irritate this guy with a simple question! The first video is him replying a reporter when he was asked this question - "avaru ku en kootam varuthu, ungaluku en varala?" :)

The highlights of this video:

1. The guy standing near T.R who jaldra adichufy for every stupid sentence. 100 ruba ku ithalam too much!
2. His precious English - Try to tell me, why are you came here?
3. "Naan nenacha tamil nade suthum" - ennala mudila..azhuthuduven...



The next one is exposing his music talent. Chitti babu's dance is more than enough to see how people kalachufy T.R!






Karadi with too much self-confidence!


En daa mike la echa thuppara...Thalam thatitte thoonguvanam vera!


No more explanation needed! Enjoy these!





Please leave any other links that you know in the comments section.

I might not write anything more this year! Have a colorful and happy new year!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Go Green!

As we all read about the COP 15, the UN climate summit in Copenhagen, I would like to bring up some simple things that we can follow in our every day life. Debating whether these are going to do any good for the climate change is unnecessary. Because, all these are going to help us have a more healthier life style and increase our savings. I am going to have this as my personal checklist and encourage every one of you to follow too.

1. Take vegetarian: Most importantly try avoiding beef. This is what I read:
"Livestock are responsible for more greenhouse gas emissions than transportation is. This is due to the large amounts of petroleum used in creating ammonium nitrate fertilizer (for the corn that they are fed) plus the cost of shipping that corn to the cattle and then shipping the cattle to slaughter and grocery. If one eats meat it should always be from a local source. "

2. Recycle more.

3. Use compact fluorescent bulbs

4. Fill the dishwasher/hand wash

5. Use recycled paper
Use any paper to the fullest extent and do not print unless it is absolutely necessary.

6. Buy locally made and locally grown products

7. Buy minimally packaged goods

8. Use a push mower to mow the lawn.

9. Unplug unused electronics
Also, switch off lights after work.

10. Use public transportation.

11. Use your vehicle as a tool against global warming
  • Practice green driving. Save gas and lower stress levels by being a considerate driver. Improve fuel efficiency by removing unused external objects such as roof racks, turning off your engine instead of idling for long periods of time (over 1 minute), and removing loads from the trunk/boot that are not necessary.
  • Keep your car tires adequately inflated
  • Change your air filter.
12. Use Refills.

Friday, December 4, 2009

To the great CM of Tamil Nadu


This is a photo that I saw in Dinamalar today. I was completely heart-broken. I could count 16 kids for sure and there should be atleast 20 of them inside this auto rickshaw.

This is what I read in the wiki about 'auto rickshaw' -

An auto rickshaw is generally characterized by a sheet-metal body or open frame resting on three wheels, a canvas roof with drop-down sides, a small cabin in the front of the vehicle for the driver (sometimes called an auto-wallah), and seating space for up to three passengers in the rear.

3 is not even mistaken as 13 in our country.

- The kid at the end - how is he/she supposed to hold the rail wihtout falling out and rolling down in the street?

- What if the kids play with each other and slightly try to push the one sitting close to her/him?

- What if the driver hits a sudden break?

I have no answers.



Here is a request to that one person who can do something about this -



"தமிழை காப்பாற்றுவதாக எண்ணும் தமிழ் நாட்டின் CM அவர்களே கொஞ்சம் தமிழர்களையும் காப்பாற்றவும்!!!"


Please spend atleast 5 mins for issues like this in the middle of attending ganesh/arthi wedding and writing scripts for paadavadhi tamil movies.

Friday, November 20, 2009

Getting old is not too bad!!!

Health, Fitness...these are the words that are lingering in my ears very often these days.
"eppadi iruntha naan ippadi aiten" this suits me perfectly (actually in positive sense), when considering health and eating habits.

Before marriage:
Mom made veggies every day, atleast 2 of them. They were all yummy and delightful with coconut and all the needed kosuru flavors. But, I was not even touching them. She requested me to eat them listing all the good things..but no was my answer all the time. So, she was feeding me (literally). I was immediately drinking water to force them inside. I was not even tasting them.

I was also not knowing the meaning of 'work out'. All I was doing after work is taking rest, sleeping and watching TV. I absolutely had no chores to do. I could not recollect why was I resting for god's sake? (enna panni kizhichennu therila?)

Wheel spinning clockwise...few years later...

Morning breakfast:
Oats, Carrot juice or Butter milk

Lunch:
Some vegetable curry with rice or chappathi, salad on fridays with soup

Snacks:
Fruits and Yoplait

Dinner:
Again vegetable curry.

Cooking spinach atleast twice a week, making sure that I cover all the vegtables available in one cycle, eating fruits as much as possible...

No one is forcing me to do all these now. But I do it out of my own interest. And I also work out as frequently as possible even after all the house work and office work (see office work comes only second :)). Or else I feel guilty.

How did I change?
I think I figured out that there is no one to take care of me and my family if I am not doing so.

Are you curious about my husband? Oh boy! he does not even remember what he had for lunch today. So I need to be more responsible.

Maturity is teaching me to be more responsible and I am getting matured as I get older.

Then, growing old is not too bad, isn't it?

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

3 years!!!

Today is a very special day for us...the day that tied us together for life. Things have been wonderful so far.

I am trying to remember the things that we used to discuss about our marriage life:

- watching movies all the time: we do this 8 hours a day now :-). We watch serials and movies in all the languages. We never get bored at it.

- eating all good food: All Indian food to be more specific. We prepare varieties at home and have a great pleasure while having it with a movie. We call this as 'Heaven' and we enjoy this more than anything in the world.
In particular, I love the weekend coffee that you prepare. It is so good to get up at 11:oo and have a coffee that I don't have to prepare :-).

- having a nice cute home: We have a cute home and we have it the way we like..simple and sweet.

- having a comfy car: This is your priority area and you have your dream car. I enjoy it as much as you do.

- chatting all non-sense: This is my priority area :-). We can talk about everything and we talk about it again and again. For example, Akshu's "Ange Inge". We never get bored doing this.

We have done all the above exactly the same way as we thought we do.

Things that I would like to add to last year's list :-):
You don't demand anything from me, right from cooking to cleaning. It is up to me and it is all according to my wish. I could not imagine how it would be, if you come and say "Cook chicken today" or "Why the clothes are still lying there?". It is the other way in our home - "We will eat outside, you don't strain cooking everyday" and "You can arrange them later, take some rest now".

I read this somewhere:
"Rocky times are a challenge to be acknowledged, worked through, and resolved so you can experience deeper friendship, greater understanding, happier times, and higher levels of life experience together." - There were some ups and downs in our life too. But they made us understand each other better and love more.

As you said yesterday, like Michael Scott and Holly in 'The Office', we are made for each other. I wish to be the same way all our life. Even at 80, we should keep watching movies and commenting on them :-).


I did not take any vows in our wedding, so I am taking one here -
"To have and to hold, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."

Wishing a very happy anniversary, my dear!

Monday, November 2, 2009

Un Kangalin Ooram yedarkagavo eeram.......

Divine music!!! Lyrics is so touching!!!

In a recent programme, a lady said that her husband sings this song whenever she is sad and every time she cries listening to this line,
"Un kangalin ooram..yedarkagavo eeram..Kaneerai naan maatruven.." - What more a girl can expect from her lover?

I am getting teary eyed too. I am making Arun to learn this song. This song will be more divine if he sings it.




Uravugal thodarkathai
unarvugal sirukathai
Oru kathai yendrum mudiyalam
Mudivilum ondru thodaralaam
Iniyellam sugame...........

Un nenjile baaram
unakagave naanum
Sumai thaangiyaai thaanguven
Un kangalin ooram
yedarkagavo eeram
Kaneerai naan maatruven
Vedanai theeralam
verum pani vilagalam
Venmegame puthu azhagile naanum inayalaam

Vaazhvenbatho geetham
valarkindratho naadham
Naal ondrilum aanandam
Ne kandatho thunbam
ini vaazhvellam inbam
Suga raagame aarambam
Nathiyile puthu punal
kadalile kalanthadhu
Nam sondhamo indru inaindathu inbam piranthathu

Thursday, October 29, 2009

My DNA

I admire one
- who is an early riser
- who is very organized
- who dresses neatly
- who is with positive attitude and a smile on the face 24 * 7
- who is with full energy the entire day
- who is not jealous
- who maintains a great home and garden
- who finds time to read even when she is super busy
- who is very good in financial budgeting
- who is creative and artistic

I know a whole lot of women who fulfill all the above criteria. I want to be like them one day! All the other things I can try, but getting up early..OMG..I think it is in my DNA and I can never change that..sigh!

Friday, October 23, 2009

Nandhalala

SPB sang this song in the recent Kamal 50 programme. I fell in love with this from that moment. Is it SPB's voice or the lyrics that I love more? I was not sure. I listened to it again and again.

There is this line:
"un kaiyil antha noolaa nee sollu nandhalala"
where SPB gives a small grin after the word "noola". OMG, his voice is heaven, pure like a child's smile.

It is SPB's voice, I got clarified!


Unakenna mele nindrai oh nandhalala
Unadhanai paadugindren naan romba naala

Thai madiyil pirandhom thamizh madiyil valarndhom
Nadigarena malarndhom naadagathil kalandhom...

aadatha medai illai podatha vesham illai
aadatha medai illai podatha vesham illai
sinthatha kanneer illai siripukkum panjam illai
Kaal kondu aadum pillai nool kondu aadum bommai
Kaal kondu aadum pillai nool kondu aadum bommai
un kaiyil antha noolaa nee sollu nandhalala

Yaar yaaro nanban yendru yemandha nenjam undu
poo endru mullai kandu puriyamal nindren indru
Pal pola kallum undu nirathale rendum ondru
Pal pola kallum undu nirathale rendum ondru
Naan yenna kalla paala nee sollu nandhalala

Unakenna mele nindrai oh nandha lala
Unadhanai paadugindren naan romba naala

Thai madiyil pirandhom thamizh madiyil valarndhom
Nadigarena malarndhom naadagathil kalandhom...

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Aadhavan - Flop!

Ayan, Aadhavan and what next?
Arasan??? Go to hell, Surya!!!

Even Arasan would have been better. But his next movie is Singam with director Hari.

"Than thalai le thaane manna vaari pottukarathu" na ithu thano?

En Blog-in soga kathai!

What will happen to my blog if I remove these tags:
badusha video
anal mele pani thuli

99.9% of my blog hits are for the above search keywords. That too, the badusha is the box office hit. But the fact is, the badusha video blog does not have a "video" :-). So people come here looking for a video and as soon as they realise that it does not have one, they exit the blog! And there are some visit lengths for '0' seconds. How is this even possible? :-(

Ippadiyum naan oru blog maintain pannanuma? But I have to. For my dear sweet friends and my husband, who visit my blog to keep up my spirit. Even they are also skimming through it quickly these days! If this continues, I have to warn them that I will conduct quiz about my blog! Ithalam oru pozhappu!!!

Friday, October 9, 2009

50 years of accomplishment!!!

This post is for our Thala...

Your guess is wrong. It is not Ajith and I am happy that I do not have such a bad taste.

Kamal Hassan...

I am a hardcore fan of him. I and Arun, watch all his movies - first day first show. And we watch them again and again and again.

When all these celebrations are going on for his 50th year in the industry, I wanted to write the important things that I detest about him. So Kamal, here we go:

1. I hate the romance that you show in movies and also the things happening in your personal life. Your personal life should be none of my concern and I do not have any rights to intrude, but I hate when I see you with Gautami.

2. Your dance really sucks. They say that you know bharathanatiyam, kuchipudi, this and that. But as a common man(???), I say that your dance is not that pleasant. You are repeating the same steps (Raising and tipping your toe, I could not explain it better but I hope you can understand because this is the one you do all the time :-)).

3. Sometimes, you act as though you karachu kudichified cine industry and you show thousand emotions for a simple scene. I think it is all Shivaji's influence. You need to really improve!

4. Your dressing sense is bad most of the time. Why do you wear pants so high like a 1950-constable?

5. In the roles that you come without moustache, you think that you look young. But the truth is you look sick. For example, as Govind Ramasamy in Dasavatharam, your face was bloated and it looked like you had 2 bondas in your mouth.

6. Please dont get over excited and make films like Dasavatharam. Do not try to show all your expertise in one film. We are ready to pay for your movie tickets. So take one step at a time. I understand your concern about age. But you can direct other young people and enact character roles. Like Unnai Pol Oruvan, you can be a 50-year old hero.

7. And final one..You remade the film 'A Wednesday', scene by scene. Vekkame illama how can you answer all the interview questions as though it is your own story and screenplay? Accepting all the praises, you say that you predicted that this story is very much essential for the society now. You are no better than that Jayam Ravi's brother.

Now this is done! I want to list atleast a couple of good things about him since I called him 'Thala'

1. I always come out with one hundred crticisms every time I see your movie. But every time, I watch you speaking in interviews so clearly and precisely, I start liking you atleast 5% more.

2. During childhood, there was this fight among us whenever we talk about movies - Rajni side or Kamal side. I chose Kamal thinking that people who support Rajni are kathukuttis and kamal fans are geniuses.
I still believe so :-).

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Weekend Movies!

Weekend movies:
Thanmathra
Rang De Basanti
Kanchipuram

Three world-class movies in three different languages. We were in awe watching these movies. Particularly, Thanmathra was great. I was not knowing much about the Alzheimer disease before this. We are planning to watch more malayalam movies from now on. Lets see how it goes!

Monday, September 28, 2009

Velai vaasi eri pochu

Enna aniyayam ithu -
http://shaze.in/Pooja/Agarbatti-cum-Dhoop-stand-98/

Rs. 3500 for a wooden stand!

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Mari Mari Ninne

We went to a 'Light Music' Concert by Yesudas in Seattle.

I was completely excited to see him. He looks just the same...just exactly the same, as I remember seeing him in Ayyappa casettes when I went to Sabarimala ages go (No No...might be, 10-12 years back :-))

The songs that had me in tears are -
Harivarasanam - I am so in love with this song. It was a divine experience listening to him. It was such a soulful rendering. 'The best', I would say.
They were trying to collect Sponsors for selected songs as this is a fund-raising concert for a temple. Till this song, there were like just 2,3 sponsors. But for this one, there were nearly 30-35 sponsors.

Mari Mari Ninne - as classical as it was. Too good!

Other than these, my opinion about the concert:
'OMG..It was delightful' - I would love to say this way. But it was good but not so good just because of one reason. It was a multi-lingual concert. And the only language in which I can enjoy music is Tamil. So I need to wait for nearly 30-40 minutes, 5 songs, to hear one tamil song.

I should not complain much. He sang other languages equally good. But I could not relate to them much.

And, there is one more feedback that I would like to give to the organizers. Then and there, they were pausing the concert and asking for sponsors. In addition to this, they said that they will not continue until they get 'n' number of sponsors. Already, there are families who had spent around 100-200$ for tickets. So it is not rational to expect more from them unless they are volunteering!

There was a medley at the end. May be because he understood that people are upset. It was damn good.

I have one feedback for Yesudas as well. Please bear with me!
Some songs he picked are just so-so kind. There are some beautiful hits that he missed. I could start with "Thanni thotti, Nee pathi naan pathi..." and go on.

Hearing these songs million times, we ended up finding some faults here and there. This is quite common in an on-stage performance. But he changed the lyrics too. But as the song becomes more complicated, more classical, no one can stop him. He was rocking!

I enjoyed it completely! But I would prefer to hear Yesudas singing my lovely Tamil songs for all the 4 hours.

"Tamizh engal uyarvukku vaan
inba thamizh engal asathikku
sudar thantha then"

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Sharing Emergency Contact Info

I got an email from a friend saying that she would like to share her emergency contact info in India to friends.

After reading her email, I cursed myself for not even thinking about this!
I shared my info with her and some of my friends later.

Please share your parents contact info with your friends(soon).

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Thank you!

Today, I had a great lunch. Infact, the best lunch.
Arun decided to treat me with his culinary skills. He helps me a lot in kitchen now and then. But today, he made me to completely relax and cooked from A-Z, all by himself.

This is the menu:
Chicken roast
Rice
Rasam

The highlight was the chicken curry which he prepared in a different style. Thanks to the kitchenmishmash blog. Arun followed the exact recipe and added some chilli powder (not in the recipe)
http://kitchenmishmash.blogspot.com/2007/06/chicken-roast-with-kuttanadan-touch.html

It turned out very well.



Thanks dear for the wonderful lunch! Expecting more treats like this from you :-)

Monday, May 11, 2009

These kids..OMG

We were doing webcam chat with my sis and her 2-yr old on saturday. My sis was trying to make the kutti talk for more than 5 minutes. She was not responding and just seeing us in the monitor. So I switched off my video and my sis said to the kutti "Saranya and Arun are not listening to you anymore, they are gone". After this (we were thinking that she believed us and were making fun at the kutti :-)), she did (she doesnt have an alternative, poor kid) all my sis asked. Dancing, singing, crying like her anna and everything...Here comes the highlight -

She saw the monitor and said, "Chanya (yes, its me), you go away...go to ur home, please dont come inside this room".

Point # 1: She did not believe my sis words at all and she was knowing that we are watching her all along. She did everything just to finish this drama and to go out and play.

Point # 2: she has not seen us till now. She has just seen us in photos. With that, she is recognizing us as someone she is very close to and referring to us in our names.

How smart these kids are! I might have just started calling my mom as "Amma" when I was 2..sigh!

Gardening '09

Yesterday, we started our gardening journey in the new home :-)
We bought a lawn mower and tried that immediately. We were not sure of the grass length. So, had a look at the neighbour's lawn and after some trial and errors, decided with a length. The mowing was successful. There are still some lengthy grasses popping out here and there. But see.. this is our first time :-(

As Arun did this simple task, I did the herculean task of spreading the lawn food, applying weed control and watering. (all with his help, again :-))

And, I had tried the following seeds:
Beans
Cucumber
Coriander
Tomato
Chilli
Methi

And also have tried
Mint
Onion
Potato

Ok..too much for a first try..but I did. Have to wait and see the results. Pray for me that atleast 2 or 3 of these should show some results. I am waiting for the day to pluck them from the plant when I am cooking and use them.

I have to try some flowers after this.

The weeds..errrrrrrrr..yet to remove them and put weed control. Oh boy! not so simple to have a cute lil garden.

But I loved what we did yesterday. I will post some pictures in future if I decide that they are looking good in my eyes :-). Now they just look like some barren land.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Hindi Class

Here are some of the hindi words we learnt from our Guruji Sarmi. Thanks to her for her patience and interest in teaching us!
This email chain (our virtual hindi class) is not only very useful, it also makes our day really pleasant. There is this perfect sharing among us. I just wish it continues to keep our working days more lively and happening!

Abhinay - Act
sujhaav/badlaav - advice
dhophear - afternoon
akele - alone
hamesha - always
nahaana/snaan - bath 
sharir - body
vyast - busy
mauka - chance
badhalna - change 
dhoka - cheating
sayaani - clever/smart
badhai - congrats
sudhaarti - corrections
sardi-khaasi - cough-cold
Naach - dance
khatarnak - dangerous
Alag - different
vibhinna - difference
mushkil - difficult
Gayab ho jaana - disappear
asaani - easily
shaam - evening
samjhao - explain 
mehesoos - felt
bukhaar - fever
jhagda - fight
kshama - forgiveness
mazaak - fun
tohfa - gift
mangalkar - greetings
nafrat - hate
tabiyat - health
madad - help
asha - hope
Magar/Par - If
fahmi - impression
tarakki - improve
upakaran - ingridients
dilchaspi - interest
utsah - interest
jawaab - answer/reply
dher - late
hasna - laugh
sunna - listen
khub - lot
Shaayad - maybe
davai - medicine
galthi - mistake
subah - morning
nadaan - innocent
padosi - neighbours
Khabar - news
pari - angel
hissa - participate
angoan - parts
Khel - play
rakhna - to keep
Safaltha - Prosperity
taang kheechenge - pulling legs
Intezaam - ready
aaram - rest
Daud - run
daatne - scold
mel - similarity
halat - situation
barf - snow
isliye - so
aalsi - somberi
keechna - take
vapas - takeback
swadith - tasty
aansuon - tears
lagta - think/thought
khayal - thought
vakt - time
taak gaye - tired
thakaan - tiredness
koshish - try
Ubalna - Boil
sabzi - vegetables
shakahaari - vegeterian
khabar - Vishayam
inthazaar - wait
Tahalna/paidhal - Walk
barbaad - waste
Saptaah - week
Kab - when
jahan - wherever
shabdh - word
Ghabrao - worry
ghoomne - wander


Body parts
Mooh - Mouth
Naak - Nose
Aaakh - eyes
hont - lips (u can hear it in hindi songs, i dont know how to write hont in english)
kaan - ear
sir - head
baal - hair
gala - neck (u can use it on ur husband, main tumhara gala daba doongi :))) 
haath - hands
payr - legs

Vegetables
1.Tomato - Tamatar (tamil it is thakkali, but hindi they say similiar to tomato only)
2. Potato - Aloo
3. Onion - Pyaaz
4. Ginger - Adrak
5. Garlic - Lehsoon
6. Chilli - Mirchi
7. Brinjal - Baigan
8. Cauliflower - Gobi / PhoolGobi (Phool - Flower, since it looks like a flower so Phool Gobi)
9. Cabbage - Pathha Gobi
10. Lady's Finger - Bhindi
11. Capsicum - Shimla Mirch
12. Carrot - Gajar (famous as in "Gajar ka Halwa")
13. Mint - Pudina
14. Cilantro - Dhania

Days
1. Sunday - Ravi-vaar
2. Monday - Som-vaar
3. Tuesday - Mangal-vaar
4. Wednesay - Budh-vaar
5. Thursday - Guru-vaar
6. Friday - Shukra-vaar
7. Saturday - Shani-vaar

Taste
sweet - meetha
sour - khatta
spicy/hot - teekha
bitter - kazhva

Relationships
Friend - Dost
Father - Pita/Baba/Papa
Mother - Ma
Brother - Bhai
Sister - Bahan

Elder Sister - Didi
Elder Sister's Husband - Jija-ji
Elder Brother- Bhaiya
Elder Brother's Wife - Bhabhi

Grandfather (Father side) - Dada-ji
Grandmother (Father side)- Dadi-ji
Grandfather (Mother side) - Nana-ji
Grandmother (Mother side)- Nani-ji

Father's Younger Brother - Chacha-ji
Father's Younger Brother's wife - Chachi
Father's Elder Brother - Tau-ji
Father's Elder Brother's wife - Tai-ji
Father's Sister - Bua
Father's Sister's Husband - Phoopha-ji

Mother's Brothers - Mama
Morthers Broher's Wife - Mami
Mother's Sister - Mausi
Mother's sister husband - Mausa-ji

Husband - Pathi
Wife - Patni
Husband/wife's Mother - Saans
Husband/wife's Father - Sasur
Husband's Younger Brother - Devar
Husband's Younger Brother Wife - Devarani Husband's Elder Brother - Jetth-ji Husband's Elder Brother wife - Jetthani-ji Husband's sister - Nanad


phal - fruits
aam - mango (madhu ne kaha)
kela - banana
seb - apple
santara - orange
angoor - grapes
chiku - whats the english for this , oh god i dont rmber :)
papitha - papaya
nariyal - coconut

jaanwar (animals )
kuttha - dog
billi - cat
sher - tiger
chuha - rat
bhaloo - bear
hiran - deer
mor/morni (male/female)  - peacock
gai - cow
bhays [bheh-s] - buffalo
bakra - goat
bandar - monkey

Friday, January 9, 2009

Anoushka - Ajith,Shalini's kutti Angel




The Man Rules

I got this one as a forward recently. I need to accept that these are 100% true :-)

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally, the guys' side of the story.
(I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear ' the rules'
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.


These are our rules!
Please note.. These are all numbered ' 1 '
ON PURPOSE !

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
Or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Hockey or Football.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.